My PrEP Journey

When you grow up in a not so progressive state like Arkansas, there are so

many stigma’s that are associated with HIV. You hear things like “You can get it

from a mosquito or even a toilet seat.” It seemed as though the HIV virus was

something to fear. But, in all actuality it was just something we knew very little

about. We sometimes tend to fear what we don’t know. Those days are pretty

much a thing of the past. With advances in modern medicine and advances in the

research, publications, education, and the like, we now know that living with HIV

can mean living a normal, healthy life, even with a partner who is HIV negative.

Whenever I was no longer afraid to hide my sexuality I was 18, a student at

UCA in Conway and very uninformed about same-sex, gay relationships. As it was

at that age, learning to navigate my sexuality was not easy. I grew up in a strict,

ultra-conservative Church of Christ family in a rural community. Ingrained in my

mind was that acting out on those “unnatural” thoughts and behaviors was a one

way ticket to hell. I know this isn’t true, and to tell a child that the way they love

someone in their mind is “wrong” or will lead to punishment is confusing,

isolating, and wrong.

I had an event in college where after a sexual experience, I was told to get

checked, that the person I had been with was HIV positive and not informing his

partners. I was tested, the results were negative, but it did make me become

more aware of how my sexual health was something to be more aware of and

take more seriously.

Not until I moved to Colorado did I first learn about PreP as a preventative

measure, a pill, that when taken properly can prevent you from contracting the

HIV virus. I had started living and dating a guy that was HIV positive and knew at

some point, sex would be an eventuality between us. When he asked my status

and if I was on PreP, I simply asked what was it. So now, I’m going to Denver

Health to learn about and get Prep so that I could physically be with the person who I thought at the time I was in love with. After one week of taking Prep, we

were good to go. I never knew that this medicine was even a possibility. For me to

be in a relationship with someone I loved, and not have to worry about either of

us and the transmission of HIV made both of us more at ease with our sexual

activities. I would think to myself “why don’t they simply put this in the drinking

water, it would eventually end the virus all together.” The fact was, and is, we can

all make better, more informed decisions, with more options to safer health

practices. Through education about safer sex practices, options for prevention

and maintenance, and now they have an injectable form of PreP taken every 2

months, adhering to the prescribed treatment plan with less worry if “did I take

it” occurring, hopefully sometime in the near future, we can greatly or all

together eliminate this virus that has taken from humanity and it be another thing

of the past.